pursuing purity

An Online Ministry/Resource from St. Charles Catholic Church

 

YOU ARE not alone.

If you are visiting this website, it means you want to experience freedom. Christ greatly desires you to experience this freedom. Purity is possible. This website was designed to help you pursue purity by giving you the tools necessary to be transformed by the power of the Cross of Christ and the amazing Grace that He won for us.

Now is a good time to also check your motivations. Often, just being tired of the false promises of porn won’t be enough to brake a vicious habit. We need to see how this really damages our relationships (with God, with our loved ones, and with ourselves) and see how freedom from porn will help us to become the people God has made us to be and the people our loved ones deserve and depend upon. If this is about self-help, it will ultimately become self-harm. Ultimately, we have to be motivated by Love, and for Love, in order to love.

There is the classic metaphor of training for a boxing match. Our opponent is the embodiment of evil – and in this case the deadly sin of lust. Part of the good news is that we have control over our opponent’s training; we can determine if we feed the opponent and how much exercise they get. However, it is not enough to starve them because if we starve ourselves as well, we still stand a chance of losing the match. Therefore, victory entails feeding ourselves healthy food and training hard while simultaneously weakening our opponent. Both of these actions must be a part of our battle plan in order to experience freedom and victory.

 

FORMULATING A BATTLE PLAN

To begin formulating a battle plan, visit The Porn Effect’s website to view their online battle plan guide. Consider these factors below when designing your plan:

A. Starving Lust

1) Notice what your triggers are.

2) Flee from temptations. If the opponent has you in the ring, it is almost too late. Victory is won by never getting into the ring.

3) Eliminate the profane things in your life (tv shows, music, videos, people, places, etc.)

B. Feeding Intimacy

“Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing.” – Jesus (John 15:5b)

Prayer and Fasting

1) Eucharistic Adoration

2) Pray the Rosary

3) Fasting

Accountability

1) Use accountability software like Covenant Eyes on your computer, phone, and tablet.

2) Develop authentic friendships

3) Experience real intimacy and healthy vulnerability

Get informed

1) Understand the effects of porn

2) Redirect our desires and motivations

Counseling

1) Understand why you do what you do. Sometimes we need an impartial, professionally trained person to help us see reality more clearly.

Patient Perseverance

1) Keep getting up and going forward. One step at a time, one day at a time.

RESOURCES

 

Given the ever-growing body of research from major institutions, it can no longer be denied that repeated porn exposure has a tangible effect on consumers, and is connected to declining relationship satisfaction as well as various forms of exploitation. This isn’t a moral argument, it’s simply something to consider given the facts. The documentary Brain, Heart, World examines these findings.

 
 

Covenant Eyes is an online accountability service is designed to help you overcome pornography use by monitoring your screen activity and sending a report to a trusted person who holds you accountable for your online choices. Your accountability partner(s) will receive comprehensive reports of your device activity, lessening the temptation to look at porn. These allies will be there to pick you up when you fall down, and cheer you on when you succeed. You are not alone. Learn more about Covenant Eyes and download it for your devices by clicking on the image.

 
 

The fight for freedom from pornography is a battle you can win, but every battle needs a plan. The Victory app is the companion app to Covenant Eyes, providing a strategic battle plan for liberty in the struggle against pornography. It delivers screen accountability reporting to you and a trusted ally you’ve chosen. This app along with Covenant Eyes will bring honesty and transparency to your accountability relationships. Wherever you are on your journey, accountability can help you and your loved ones live porn-free.

 
 

Integrity Restored helps restore the integrity of individuals, spouses, and families that have been affected by pornography and pornography addiction. Integrity Restored provides education, training, encouragement, and resources to break free from pornography, heal relationships, and to assist parents in preventing and responding to pornography exposure which is devastating in the lives of our children. They are also a resource that trains and helps clergy in assisting families at the parish level. Visit Integrity Restored here.

 

For women

Beggar’s Daughter is a website ministering to women who are struggling with pornography use. The site was founded by Jessica Harris, whose own struggle with pornography use motivated her to create this resource to help other Christian women. Harris travels nationally to speak to groups about porn, sex, singleness, sexual exploitation, and grace. She is the author of Beggar’s Daughter, her memoir, and Love Done Right: Reflections, which is a devotional book for young women.

Magdala Ministries was founded with the knowledge that pornography, masturbation, and other sexual addictions aren't just a "guy problem." Magdala exists as a space where women can find hope, healing, and freedom alongside each other from sexual addiction. Their goal is to supply you with support, community, and accountability through virtual groups available to women. These groups are available for women ages 18 and up all over the globe, and they partner with campuses to form groups in person as well. If you’re interested in forming/joining a group at St. Charles, please contact Sarah Freddino at sfreddino@stcharleschurch.org.


FOR MEN

Augustine's Brothers was formed in response to the need for a Catholic-centered men's accountability group for those struggling with maintaining chastity and seeking support to grow purity. Augustine’s Brothers is a support / accountability group for men who struggle with pornography as well as other excessive sexual behaviors. Click the picture to confidentially join the men’s accountability group here at St. Charles!

STRIVE is a powerful 21-day detox program to help men get on the path toward freedom. Participants receive a practical step-by-step plan to break free from pornography, and a supportive community of men from around the world journeying together. You’ll also have lifetime access to the challenge and current and future live events. Access STRIVE here.

 

Documents from Bishops: